Popeye: Requiem Film Review

For some odd reason Popeye of all characters seems to be the in character to give a cheaply made horror film to this is despite the fact that an official big screen take on the character has been hard to pull off since the eighties. As now we have part two of a three part series of sequels with the final part also out right now and yeah if you've seen either Popeye's Revenge or Popeye Returns then you pretty much no what it is your going to be getting with bad film as even the worst of the original Popeye cartoons is better then this film and so then join me as I review the film that has a predictable reveal with the film in question being called simply just "Popeye: Requiem" enjoy.

The plot of this film is mere moments after being captured at the end of the second film Popeye once again escapes the military and it's up to a few survivors from the previous film to try and not only survive this latest attack but also call of a military air strike. Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual plot that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual plot that's actually featured / presented to us in this film was in all honesty really bad. With this films plot at best being laughably bad and at it's worst just straight up not there with the films plot not even being so bad it's good it's just bad as it does feel like that the makers of this film had no idea of what kind of story that they wanted to tell and where just throwing stuff at the wall with none of it sticking. Heck the film doesn't even focus on it's plot alot of the time which does make the films plot feel secondary to the fact that they have a beloved kids character as the main villain which even then given the fact that there is a shockingly high amount of Popeye themed horror films doesn't even work as we the audience could just watch quite literally any of the other Popeye horror films and get a better plot therefor there really should have been more of an effort to give this film a better plot as this the middle part of a three film story and there's no story reason for this to be the case as what little plot there is in not only the previous film but also this film doesn't warrant being told over multiple parts with the plot of this film also being really rather entertaining and as well as being really rather engaging as well in my freaking opinions anyways / at least. 

Starring in this film is Lara Sas as Cassie , Steven Murphy as Popeye , Fitim DeStena as Dylan and Danny Sains as Oscar. Also starring in this film is Marie Ann Watson as Dr. Bernard , Juliette Smith as Lindy , Arber Prendi as Questel , Christopher Morley as O'Brien , Graeme Muncer as Donnelly , Jack Hyde as Mendoza , Nathan Geering as Deitch , Amy Gibbons as Tina , Will Middleton as Malcolm , Mark Tunstall as Derek and Jessie Vinning as Kitty.

Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual acting that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual acting that's actually featured / presented to us in this film was in all honesty really bad. Look the fact that this film has as bad of acting as it is has is something that we do have to expect from these films not just the Popeye films but also films like The Mouse Trap and Peter Pan's Neverland Nightmare as they all do have bad acting in them and the same thing is true for his film with even the actors that are returning from Popeye Returns and are or going to be in Popeye: Resurrection not being all that good in this film. With the best actor in the film being Lara Sas as Cassie as while she doesn't get to do a whole lot in this film especially when compared to the previous film she is still in the film alot and alot of her scenes in the film are decently acted and while her acting in this film isn't that good when compared to the rest of the films actors however it does come off as being alot more better as you can tell that she is trying to turn in a good performance with her treating the film like it's going to be a big break for her when it's obviously not as no one is going to be seeing this film and it will just get lost in the shuffle of all the Popeye themed horror films out there therefor there was no need for her treat this film as if it's going to lead to something bigger with her natural charm shining through in her performance. With the acting that's in this film not really being helped by he fact that this films script is just so bad as it gives none of this films actors absolutely anything to work with interms of what it is that there actual characters personalities are even meant to be in the first place which is something that really does harm the overall quality of the acting that's in this very film.

Character wise this films characters are just as bland , dull , boring and forgettable as you'd think that they would be. As all of them are badly done characters which for the new characters is fine as they are just there to serve as victims for Popeye but it's also the same thing for the returning characters as none of this films characters have anything interesting about them that makes you want to like and want to get to know more about as the film doesn't take the time to let you get to know and to let them become more then then trope that they are hoping to be as Dylan is still the hold over character from Popeye's Revenge and Cass is still just a blank slate that does whatever the plot tells her to do even if it's against what little character she has in the first place. To be frank it does feel like that the writers of these films spent a weekend writing up all of the scripts as the characters are that bare bones with this being something that makes it obvious that the makers of this film didn't care about making a genuinely good film they cared more about making a cheaply made cash grab of a film with that being something that does shine through in the films characters as they very easily could have fixed this films characters by doing a rewrite of the films script as then they would have the chance to fix any and all issues with both the script and its characters and yet due to the fact that they didn't care about that they just left the characters as bare bones characters and while yes alot of the slasher films of eighties also did exactly that those films were making those tropes in the first place and not following them with even alot of them having fun with those tropes once they started to become popular whereas here tho it does feel like that they just weren't that bothered to make interesting characters and were just hoping that people will like the film because of the fact that a beloved kids character is the main villain.

This film is the middle part of a three part storyline and it really didn't need to be three films long as unlike Avengers: Infinity War or any two part film this film as well as Popeye Returns and Popeye: Resurrection don't have a story that is worth telling across as three film. With the whole point of doing a multipart film being to tell a story that can't be told in one film and yet you could very easily tell the stories of these films in one film as the story being told what little there is isn't big enough to demand multiple films yet for some odd reason the makers of these Popeye sequels thought that this is a story that does demand alot of films all of which being released very close together to tell there story and it just makes you wonder what they were thinking when they came up with that idea. With this film being the middle part of the story and yet there's nothing in this film that raises the stakes of the story and that makes you want to watch part 4 as while they do start something with the military almost bombing the area where the main characters are the character do end up stopping that when that is is something that could make for a great hook for part 4 with the one of the few decent things in the film being the fact that the film doesn't waste anytime in setting up things for Popeye: Resurrection which is something that is very easily could have dine and is something that alot of two part movies do do with there first part and yet this film dose still come of as being really bad despite the fact that it's not one long trailer or the next film as it's clear as day that due to the fact that all of these films were filmed together that all of the best or hopefully best stuff is going to be in the final film by which point it will be to little to late as no one would have cared enough about the characters to see all of the good stuff as the makers of this film didn't give us a reason to care for there characters in the first place.

For some odd reason this film pretty much stops about half way threw after it's killed off alot of the army characters to introduce to us these new characters. Which does come out of nowhere with alot of there early scenes adding nothing to the film with them being this family that have gone on a camping holiday and that's literally the only thing we find out about them other then the fact that one of them is dating an American girl and it's just weird that the film would replace these decent but not good characters with these new characters that they then have to rush in setting up this wouldn't be an issue if they were appearing in the fourth film but the only one that survives this film isn't even going to be in the next one. This is something that does make there inclusion in this film feel all the more pointless as there early scenes in the film feel like a completely different movie when compared to the rest of the film heck given how the first half act of the film goes it feels more like an ending to Popeye's Revenge then the opening of this film which begs the question why not just put those scenes in that film and get that film up to one hour and thirty minuets and then start this film with a small time jump before then getting into the rest of the film with the family surely that would have been alot more better then cramming in more characters into this film and making this film feel very over stuffed with characters as all this ends up doing is making sure that no one in the audience can like any of the films new characters as they all have to fight for screen time with each other and heck even the films central villain Popeye disappears for a large portion of the film because of the fact that the film now has to set up who these new and quite frankly boring new characters are. 

There is a really painfully obvious reveal in this film that when it first got hinted at and I saw the look of Dylan I knew right away what was going to be happen and sure enough it happens. The film introduces this new injection that the military have been working on to make soldiers stronger called Bluto and the second that it wa brought up in this film and you see the Dylan looks alot like Bluto from Popeye you just know exactly what's going to happen and sure enough in the films third act he injects himself with it and fights Popeye this was such a predictable reveal that it's quite honestly laughable as they do make the actor that plays Dylan look roughly like how we expect Bluto to look with them both having big beards and a hatred of Popeye and therefor when it does happen it's not that shocking as you already knew it was coming with the other plot reveal being one that does actually work even tho it was that you kind of work out when the scene is going on as the film does strongly hint at Dr. Bernard being Popeye and Olive's mother as yes Olive Oyl is meant to be Popeye's sister in these films it was something that they did back in Popeye's Revenge and the character is meant to be showing up in Popeye: Resurrection as they do say that there mother got pregnant with them after being exposed to some chemicals with Dr. Bernard saying that she should have killed Popeye when he was in the womb which does all but confirm that she is his mother and going by Google it does seem as if he did have a mother called Irene but she only appeared in alternative comic book backstories therefor it's not out of the realm of possibility that this version of Popeye also has a mother with that reveal actually being better done then he reveal of Dylan basically transforming himself into Bluto to take on Popeye one on one.

Now then this film has / had an exact grand total running time of exactly one hour and eleven minuets and thirty seconds. Which yeah is never a good sign when the middle part of your trilogy is not even a feature length running time as there is so much story that could have been covered in this film and so much that needed to get done to make the next film work and yet due to how short that both this film and the previous film is none of that leg work can be done with even the next film having a very similar running time to it all of this does hit home the fact that the makers of this film just didn't care enough to make these films as good as they could have because if they did then they would have given the films a longer running time heck even Darbie's Screamhouse is longer then this film is and that film was meant to be bad with this film just barely having more then enough plot there to cover that amount of running time in the first place. With thus film not even using it's running time all that wisely as the film doesn't take the time to fully develop it's plot due to the fact that the film not only barely focuses on it's plot with the film being more bothered about focusing on this new family for literally no reason but the film also barely has a plot to begin with this is something that really could have been fixed if the makers of this film did a re-write of the films terrible script with the makers of this film being more focused on shoving this random family down our throats then they are in giving us a well developed plot. This is something that des also effect the films character development as this is the film where all of the returning characters except for Popeye should have gotten some form of character development and yet none of them do with all of the films characters ending the film in the exact same way that they started the film with the makers of his film being more focused on not giving us alot of Popeye rather then giving its characters some actual character development but I really will admit that this film really does gave some really good pacing to it tho.

So now then as this is a slasher that really does mean that I have to actually talk about the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty not that bad. With us getting to see alot of the kills in this film and while granted none of the kills look all that impressive that is more due to the films tiny budget then anything else with the one thing that lets all of the kills down in this film being the fact that two characters survive getting stabbed in the back by Popeye one of which was stabbed in the back with a harpoon gun this is something that shouldn't have happend as all it does cheapen wat could have been a really good kill all for no reason whatsoever. With the best kill in the whole entire film being the death of Popeye as a fully transformed Dylan takes on Popeye one on one with the pair of them having a pretty decent fight for its budget with all the while Cass and Lindy are trying to escape this empty military compound so that they can tell the military not to bomb them all the while Popeye and Dylan are still fighting each other with neither one really getting the upper with it only being when the fight nears its end that Dylan does finally get the upper hand and crushes Popeye's skill in with some impressive make up being put to good use and while this is a much more funnier kill in the film that kill is only funny due to how bad it is whereas the death of Popeye is just so cool to look at and while it doesn't redeem the film at all it does make the ending more then worth watching with the rest of the films kills being just as good as well in my freaking opinions anyways / at least. 

Overall whilst this film is nowhere near as bad as Darbie's Screamhouse was this still a really bad film and that the fact that there's one more of these films out does make you wonder how bad that that film is going to be as this is film that close to being bottom of the barrel trash in my freaking opinions anyway / at least. Now then i've talked about all of the good and as well as all of the bad things that are in this very film in this very review that really does mean that this very film really does earn itself a grand old score of exactly a 0.5 out of 10 from me.

Now then as or where I personally got all of the images hat I personally used in this very review well then boys and girls and as well as ladies and gentlemen I personally got all of the images that I personally used in this very review from Tenor , IMP Awards . Com and Google Images. With my personally preferred website to use to get images from this film being Google Images simply because Google Images actually has images from this film really are up and on Google Images and plus pretty much much all of the images that I personally found on Google Images were all really very fairly high quality and as well as being as really very fairly high definition as well and so then horror fans we end this review as we always do with really our one and true goddess Elvira wishing us all some really very unpleasant dreams.

Freddy Vs. Jason Film Review

The idea of having two characters meet and fight each other is a fanboys dream and it's one that's been happening in a films alot with even the likes of Batman Vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles being a thing. Yet it is something that has it routes in horror as horror films where doing this kind of film on a regular basis in the forties and yet it's the film that i'm going to be talking to you all about today that made it popular for the more modern audience and so then join me as I review the film that is the final time that Robert Englund played Freddy Krueger in a film with the film in question being called simply just "Freddy Vs. Jason" enjoy.

The plot of this film is when Freddy resurrects Jason and gets him to kill kids on Elm Street it's this small group of friends that end up caught in the middle when Jason can't stop killing and Freddy has to take him on. Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual plot that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual plot that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty not that bad. With this films plot not being the best plot that either franchise has had but given the fact that this is meant to be a dumb horror Vs. movie you do kind of expect that especially from both of these franchises that both franchises did have plots that were getting pretty bad at best. To be fair no one is going to be a film called Freddy Vs. Jason expecting the plot to be really good rather your going to it expecting to see the two characters fight each other and that's it therefor you do need to go into this film expecting the plot to be pretty bad this doesn't make it a good thing tho as there really was the potential here to have a really good plot that brought together both of the franchises in a fun and creative way and yet there really is no fun to be fun in this films plot which granted is to be expected but at the same time if your going to give the film the most basic of plots then why not go all out and make it a fun plot that honors both franchises with it feeling like that the films plot is borrowing more from A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors then it any of the Friday The 13th films which is great for the Freddy fans but not great if your a Jason fan and if your doing a Vs movie you need to have a plot that honors both worlds not just one over the other with the plot of this film also being really rather entertaining and as well as being really rather engaging as well in my freaking opinions anyways / at least.

Starring in this film is Robert Englund as Freddy Krueger , Ken Kirzinger as Jason Voorhees and Monica Keena as Lori Campbell. Also starring in this film is Kelly Rowland as Kia Waterson , Jason Ritter as Will Rollins , Christopher George Marquette as Charlie Linderman , Lochlyn Munro as Deputy Scott Stubbs , Katharine Isabelle as Gibb Smith , Brendan Fletcher as Mark Davis , Zack Ward as Bobby Davis , Kyle Labine as Bill Freeburg , Chris Gauthier as Shack , David Kopp as Blake , Jesse Hutch as Trey Cooper , Tom Butler as Dr. Campbell , Garry Chalk as Sheriff Williams and Paula Shaw as Pamela Voorhees.

Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual acting that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual acting that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty not that bad. As the film does gave some decent acting in it from the likes of Robert Englund who is still pitch perfect as Freddy Krueger and Monia Keena who is passable in the film but where the acting does dip is with alot of the side characters as Kelly Rowland just isn't that good in the film and while Katharine Isabelle is a horror icon in her own right she's not in this film all that long to really make an impression and show off just what it is that she can do as an actor. With the best actor in the film being Robert Englund as Freddy Krueger with this being something that does make sense as he was the only actor carried over from the franchise with him also being someone who has played Freddy Krueger in every single film with him having a really good understanding of just who Freddy is which is something that really does help his performance in this film as he would know how Freddy would react in any given scene as he's been playing him since the original Nightmare On Elm Street with Robert even having his trademark and wit and charm which does help to make his performance as the character feel more well rounded as it would have been very easy for him to just play the hits and give us nothing more then that but you can tell that he is giving it his all in this film with his own charm really coming through in his performance. With the acting that's in this very film really being helped by the fact that this films script is just so bd as it gives none of this films characters absolutely anything to work with interms of what it is that there actual characters personalities are even meant to be in the first place which is something that really does harm the overall quality of the acting that's in this very film.

Doing the CGI for this film is Cinesite , Pixel Magic , Digital Dimension Entertainment Group , Asylum VFX , Digiscope and Yannix Technology Corporation. Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual CGI that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual CGI that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty not that bad. The films CGI for the time that this film was made in is pretty decent as don't forget horror films in the early 2000's never had any kind of CGI in them and therefor for this film to have CGI in it in the first place is still a bug thing and while yes this films effects aren't that good. This is more due to when the film was made and the fact that it didn't have a huge effects budget and not due to the effects themselves being really bad with the only bad looking effect in the whole film being the CGI blood that disappears in Lori's first nightmare scene and that's basically it and even then that effect isn't that good due to the fact that there are other bigger effects that would have required more of the effects teams attention, when people today judge this film they are judging the effects by the standards that we have to today and that's not fair you have to judge the films effects for how they would have been back when the film was being made and taking that into account the films effects do some as being alot better with the effect on the Freddy Slug being something that does stand out due to the fact that they even added in a shadow for the creature which was something that they really didn't have to do with the thing that hold the effect back being the fact that it's shown in fully bright scenes whereas if it was shown in a more darker scene like the effect with Freddy's shadow then the effects team would have been able to hide alot of the more bad moments on that Freddy Slug effect. 

Whilst this film does take place sometime in between Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday and Jason X as at the end of Jason Goes To Hell we do see Freddy's hand come out and drag Jason's mask to hell. This film is mean to be set in it's own continuity one where the events of both films have happened as we see clips from all of the previous Nightmare films and Jason's mother does appear in the film with Jason even wearing his iconic mask with the only difference being the fact that now Springwood and Camp Crystal Lake are now just a few hours drive away from each other which in all fairness doesn't harm the continuity of both films that much but when you take into account that according to Freddy's Dead there was mean to be no more teenagers near Springwood which according to this film would have included Crystal Lake then it doesn't make sense for them to be as close to each other as they are in this film. This is something that the makers of this film should have payed close attention to as while they rightfully do want to try and respect the lore and legacy of both characters which it could be argued that they do end up doing they do end up ignoring the continuity of the films when it suits them as while Jason X isn't effected as that film is set in the far future both Freddy's Dead and to a lesser extent New Nightmare are effected by it as while New Nightmare is set in the real world Freddy in that movie knows that he's a character in this film the only real hints of that that we do get is when he breaks the fourth wall to talk to the audience and that's it but when it comes to Freddy's Dead that's when the continuity gets messed up as even tho they show how he died in that film they openly say that it's been peaceful in Springwood for four years yet Freddy's Dead came out in and took place in the nineties therefor this is something that doesn't quite add up.

If one was to use wrestling terms on this film then Jason is made out to be the babyface and Freddy Krueger is the heel in what is for sure a heel vs heel fight. As the film does make Jason out to be the more sympathetic of the two despite the fact that he actually kills more people then Freddy in this film and even tho Freddy is the one that brought Jason back to life to kill all of these teens on Elm Street he is still rightfully made out to be the heel of the two despite the fact that Freddy actually take a more proactive role in helping to defeat Jason even helping the teens drug Jason at one point in the film and to be fair this kind of dynamic does work given both characters backstories as when Jason was killed he was just a n innocent little boy who hadn't done anything and was bullied for how he looked and that was it where as Freddy was easily the more evil one due to the fact that he was killing kids well before he was killed by there parents. However it would have made more sense for neither villain to be the babyface and for them both to be the heel as they have both killed alot of people prior to meeting each other and therefor they would of course be quite evil and this is something that would have been if the makers of this film had respected Jason's past and his legacy as much as they do Freddy and while yes i'm a Freddy fan and therefor of course I love the fact that they put alot more of the focus onto him and respected his legacy quite alot i'm also a small Friday The 13th fan and yet there was nothing in this film that showed the makers of this film respected the legacy of those films and those characters because if they did then both characters would have been made to be the heel with the only true babyface's being the teens as it should always be in a horror film.

Speaking of the teens in this film they aren't the best in either franchises long history but much like with the plot and the acting that is something that you kind of expect. As alot of the best characters in both franchises are in the early films and not in the latter ones with there not really being anything in this film that makes the teens in this film stand out and yet we are expected to route for them which doesn't end up happening as there boring The CW teen drama filled scenes aren't that much fun to watch with an yet if you look at the teen from both Nightmare On Elm Street 1 and Friday The 13th Part 2 for example those are characters that you wanted to get to know more about as the makers of those films yes they did just drop us of right in the middle of the action but they also gave us scenes that made us feel something for those characters and made us want t get to know them more and therefor we ended up caring more about them. Yet with with this film we don't have anything like that with the closest thing being the fact that we find out that Will and Lori used to date and that it's which is a great starting off point but all of there scenes together revolve around that one part of them and that makes alot of there scenes together boring to watch and its the same thing with all of the characters as none of them have anything interesting about them with the makers of this film not really giving us the chance to care for them therefor when Lori has her big defiant moment where she vows to see Freddy dead it doesn't mean anything because of the fact that we weren't given a reason to care for her character this is despite that fact that they moment and the moments where she blows up Camp Crystal Lake is a really cool moment in the film.

Now then this film has / had an exact grand total running time of exactly one hour and thirty seven minuets and sixteen seconds. To be fair this is pretty much the bogstanderd running time for both of these franchises but at the same time tho this film that really could have been a about ten minuets longer as the film does rush from plot point plot point alot of the time with there being no room for the films plot to breathe with this being something that alot of the other films on both franchises would do as while yes they would take the time to have lots of kills but inbetween those moments the plots of of those films would be allowed to breathe to little thus allowing for tension to be built up all over again with this film having mor then enough plot there to really cover that amount of running time. With this film not really using its running time all that wisely as the film as the film really doesn't take the time to fully develop it's plot with this being due to the fact that the film is rushing towards either the next kill or to get to the end as the films pacing is that fast which does little for things to be added to the films plot plot that make it feel more well thought and developed like for example the film does start something with Jason being afraid of water which if you were just watching this film and nothing more would make sense but when you take the other Friday The 13th films into account alot of which do involved Jason killing someone near the lake that one little detail now makes no sense and it they there was time devoted to explaining that away then may be it could have worked but the makers of this film were more focused in making sure that they go as many nudge to previous Nightmare On Elm Street films as they could we ended up with a poorly developed plot. This is something that does also effect the films character development as none of the films characters get any kind of development in this film with even a character like Nancy in the first Nightmare movie getting some small amount of character development as she does learn how to defend herself and becomes a more stronger character because of it yet here in this film none of it's characters can get that due to the fact that the makers of this film have to rush the film along but I really will admit that this film really does have some really bad pacing to it tho.

So now then as this is a  slasher that really does mean that I gave to actually talk about the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in tis very film well then in all honesty i in all honesty personally thought / felt tat the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in tis very film was in all honesty not that bad. With the kills for the teens perhaps being the more weaker part of it as alot of there kills do happen of screen this is despite the fact that the film was given an American R rating and yet alot of there deaths barring only a very small handful are all of screen deaths with this being something that you never want to be the case in a slasher as you always want to see the kill happen on screen and when we do get an on screen kill it is an effective kill which does show you that the makers of this film do know how to give us a good kill. With the best kill in this film whole entire being the deaths of both Jason and Freddy as it is the main reason for anyone to go and watch this film and may god does the fight live up to the build as the fight basically happens in two stages the first of which is the Nightmare world where Freddy tortures and beats the heck out of Jason and yet the second half of the fight takes place in the real world with Freddy still getting the upper hand at times but now due to it being in the real world and not the nightmare world Jason is able to get a the upperhand with it only being when the fights reaches the lake that both character start getting more up close and personal with Freddy taking out Jason's eyes and fingers with his glove and Jason ripping Freddy's gloved with the whole thing coming to and end when a tired and near death Jason uses Freddy's arm against and Lori chops of Freddy's head with Jason's machete with alot of the films kills being just as good as well in my freaking opinions anyways / at least.

Overall whilst this film does live up to it's name and gives you exactly what it promises Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees fighting each other the film is just so of the time as it's not that much fun of a film to watch due t the badly done teen characters and yet when the film does focus of either Freddy or Jason that's when you get to see just how much fun that this film really should have been in my freaking opinions anyways / at least. Now then i've talked about all of the good and as well a all of the bad things that are in this every film in this very review and a such that really dos mean that this very film really does earn itself a grand old score of exactly a 6.5 out of 10 from me.

Now then as for were I personally got all of the images that I personally used in this very review well then boys and girls and as well as ladies and gentlemen I personally for all of the images that I personally used in this very review from Tenor , Amazon . Co . Ul , IMP Awards . Com and Google Images. With my personally preferred website to use to get images from this film being Google Images simply because Google Images actually has images from this film really are up and on Google Images and plus pretty much much all of the images that I personally found on Google Images were all really very fairly high quality and as well as being as really very fairly high definition as well and so then horror fans we end this review as we always do with really our one and true goddess Elvira wishing us all some really very unpleasant dreams.

Ice Cream Man 2026 Film SPOILER FILLED Film Review

Horror has been having quite the high over the past years with films like Late Night With The Devil , In A Violent Nature and Obsession all proving that horror films be done well with a few of them even becoming huge box office hits. However for ever high there must be a low and while there are a great deal many of horror films that could be that low point just for this year alone the film that i'm going to be talking to you all about is easily one one of the lowest horror films of this past year and so then join me as I give you my SPOILER FILLED review of the film that is the quintessential Eli Roth horror film with the film in question being called simply just "Ice Cream Man" enjoy.

The plot of this film is when an evil ice cream man arrives into his town it's up to Jared his sister Lizzy and his friends Tommy and Mia to try and stop him before it's far to late. Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual plot that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual plot that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty really bad. There's really no point in sugar coating this at all as yeah this films is really bad and not in a way that makes it become good again as the film for alot of the time doesn't seem to have a plot this is despite the fact that the idea of a bunch of kids having a stop a creepy person is a good idea. The films plot is even wafer thin at best as the film does pick up and drop it's plot not only several times to the point where you have to ask yourself just what the main plot of the film is even meant to be in the first place but it also does it for large portions of the film with the films plot feeling secondary to the films kills and whilst that might have worked in the eighties and nineties as it's clear as day that this film is meant to be a throwback to the slasher films of that era it's something that doesn't work today as today we do expect an actual plot in our horror movies with films like Obsession and Late Night With The Devil proving that you can have effective horror moments and still have alot of focus on plot and yet it's something that this films co-producer , co-writer and director Eli Roth who himself made the great Thanksgiving has seemingly forgotten to do in this film with the plot of this film not really being really rather entertaining and as well as being really rather engaging as well in my freaking opinions anyways / at least.

Starring in this film is Ari Millen as Jonathan Smiley / The Ice Cream Man , Charlie Zeltzer as Jared and Shiloh O'Reilly as Tommy. Also starring in this film is Kiori Mirza Waldman as Mia , Sarah Abbott as Lizzie , Benjamin Byron Davis as The Priest , Dylan Hawco as Chris , Saw VI and Thanksgiving star Karen Cliche as Alison , this films co-producer , co-writer and director Eli Roth as Marty , Darrin Baker as Principal Maloney , Rodrigo Fernandez-Stoll as Mr. Hamlin , Charlie Storey as Piper and Luke Dietz as Elliot.

Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual acting that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual acting that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty average at best. The fact that this films acting is about as average as it gets is something that is both a good and a bad thing it's a bad thing as Eli Roth as a director can get good acting out of his actors and yet here it feels like he's just being lazy and it's a good thing because of the fact that this films actors are for the most part very little known actors and therefor of course we wouldn't know what to expect from them acting wise and while some are used better then others those that are used in the right way do give us some good performances. With the best actor in this film being Charlie Zeltzer as Jared as the whole film really does rest on him giving us a good performance which is a lot of pressure to put on a kid actor and thank god he pulled off as well as he could done because if not this film would sunk even further with him making Jared just this typical normal kid who is thrown into this extraordinary situation and yet it is something that he does pull off with him having some great chemistry with Sarah Abbott , Shiloh O'Reilly and Kiori Mirza Waldman and while the kid might have a future as an actor he does thus far need a good director to get that good performance out of him with him being really good in this film and having a natural charm and charisma that does come through in his final performance. With the acting that's in this film not really being helped by the fact that this films script is just so bad as it gives none of this films actors absolutely anything to work with interms of what it is that there actual characters personalities are even meant to be in the first place which is something that really does harm the overall quality of the acting that's in this very film.

This films character are about as bad as you'd expect them to be as there really is nothing to any of this films characters. It would be a stretch to say that these characters have one personality trait as they don't even have that there just bland characters that do feel like the kinds of characters that we would have seen in a cheaply made eighties slasher film which would have been fine if this film was released in the eighties but it wasn't it was made and released this year and therefor there should have been some amount of effort put into this films characters and not just have them be stock character types with Jared being the leader of the group , Tommy being the wisecracker and both Mia and Lizzie being the token girl character. This films characters and the kinds of characters that would get made fun off in a parody movie as there's nothing to them outside of what the film needs there personality to be from scene to scene with them feeling like the kinds of characters that we would see in a the first draft of a script and not the characters that you want to see in the finished product and yet Elio Roth and co-writer Noah Belson who does deserve as much hate for this film as what Eli Roth is currently getting thought these characters where OK to be in the film when it wouldn't have hurt them to re-write the script as this is something that would have allowed them to make changes to the characters and yet they didn't as they clearly didn't care enough to go that extra mile to give us characters that have personalities to begin with, while yes granted the makers of this film do a decent enough job of making the characters that your meant to like likable none of that means anything as there's nothing to make feel anything for the characters in the first place.

SPOILERS START HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Despite the film sharing the same title of the 1995 film Ice Cream Man this film is actually not a remake of that film it's it's own unique thing with the only things that the two films share is a the title and the fact that the killer is an ice cream man and that's it. This is kind of a confusing thing as the film is titled after a 1995 film and even features the same type of villain and yet it's not a remake if your going to steal that much from the original film hen you might as well go all the way and just make it a remake as the audience is already confused in the first place as alot of them will be expecting it to be a remake and yet it's not and the other half isn't sure if it's remake or not when it would have been so much more easier for everyone involved just to make it a remake. Altho given the fact that this film borrows from alot of other horror films ranging from Weapons to Children Of The Corn it might have been for the best that they didn't add in another horror film to the mix but speaking off that it is weird that they made the film like Children Of The Corn and Weapons as we do see the children going insane and killing every single adult that they see which is great for the films kills but all it does is remind you that you could be watching two other films when doing something original would have helped the film all the more as then the film would have the chance to standing on it's own with out the comparisons to those other films and yet due to the fact that the tried to make ice cream scary much like how Stephen King tried to make corn scary and how Weapons tried to make running with your arms out scary it just doesn't work as those films explained why those things are scary in the first place and yet there the reveal as to why the ice cream man and his ice cream being scary is just so stupid with alot of it being unanswered that all it does is leave you asking more questions.

Whilst alot of people are going to rightfully be talking about the use of AI in the animated segments in the film. What is more frustrating is the fact that Eli Roth himself stated sometime ago that there was no AI in his film and those animated segments where all 2D hand drawn animation and yet now when the film is coming out does he say that's it's AI look it would have been one thing if he always said that it was AI and that he was going to be using that technology with him giving us a reason as to why he went that rout like maybe the production couldn't afford to do hand drawn animation and therefor they wen with AI as it's the cheaper option that would've been fine as then they'd be a logistical reason for it in the film but he didn't he openly lied for months about for sometime with there being no reason given as to why they used AI in the first place. To be fair to this film the AI used in the film isn't that noticeable if you dont know that it's being used as there's nothing about those animated segments that truly stand out and make it obvious that it was done using AI but if you know that it is being used then it is something that will notice right away and while it is wrong that it is being used that as they very easily could have done some hand drawn animation for the film given how long it takes to make animated shorts in that style that might not have been the best of options and it might have been why the makers of this film chose to use AI as for why they chose to lie about it that is a tougher question to answer as if they said it was in the film early on then they could have used the negative attention to the films advantage and used it to get more people to see the film but by doing it as late as they did they pretty much guaranteed that that was never going to happen. 

For some odd reason this film is less of a straight up slasher film and more of a horror comedy which by all means isn't a bad idea as the film does have a goofy enough main villain that it could work. However the makers of the film forgot to do one very important thing when making a comedy and that's give us jokes that are actually funny as while yes the film does indeed have jokes in it none of them are funny like for example there's joke and Jared falls over while being chased by possessed kids with him being unable to catch up to his friends because of the fact that he tripped over his shoe laces granted this is a funny twist on the trope of someone tripping when there running but the film does nothing funny with that idea. The same thing is true for when Lizzy needs rescuing from her love interest with him only agreeing to rescue her if she agreed to go out on a date with him which isn't funny and yet the film wastes alot of time on just that joke with there only being one joke in the whole film where I chuckled and that's it and it's not even a memorable joke with the joke being this obsessed overly protet9ive type of mother scolding her possessed kid for apparently bullying someone which was a funny little joke and the fact that they bring that character back once more  does make it all the more funnier and yet it's that one joke out of the entire film that was somewhat funny as the makers of this film put more thought and more effort into the films horror aspect then they did the comedy aspects when if your doing something that is essentially a horror comedy the split needs to be even for it work and there needs to be jokes that are actually funny and just really groan inducing alike alot of the jokes in this film did ultimately end up being.

Now then the this film has / had an exact grand total running time of exactly one hour and nineteen minuets and twenty two seconds. Which much like alot of other things in this film is a huge problem for the film as this is a film that really needed to be at the very least one hour and forty to to maybe one hour and forty five minuets as there is so much to pack into this film and with the extra running time then the film would have been while to fully flesh out both it's plot and characters something which it isn't able to do with it's current running time as the film dos gave alot of things to fit in and something does end up falling threw cracks that being the fact that the film doesn't fully flesh out both the plot and the characters this is despite the fact that this film really does have more then enough plot there to cover that amount of running time in the first place. With the film not even using its running time all that wisely as the film doesn't take the time to fully develop it's alot as it couldn't afford to as the film does have so much stuff to fit in that does it leave the film feeling over stuffed with this being something that could have been fixed if the film was a little bit longer with this then having the advantage of allowing the makers of the film to give the plot more focus and development however tho the makers of this film alot more focused on fetishizing then they are in giving us a well developed plot. This is something that does also effect the films character development as well as none of the films characters are allowed to become fully developed characters as the film has to rush along to the next plot point and it has to rush along to the next kill whereas if the film was longer then it would be able to to give the character the character development that they really did it with it being made crystal clear that the makers of this film put more thought into the films comedy that they did into giving the film characters some character development but I really will admit that this film really does have some really good pacing to it tho.

So now then as this is a slasher that really does mean that I have to actually talk about the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty really good. With the films kills being the best part of the film as there is alot more thought and creativity put into the films kills then there was to quite literally any other aspect of the film and may god does it show as we do get some really good fun and gory kills in the film all of which work and while one of them are goofy which given the fact that the films killer is an ice cream man they really could have been they do still work for the film. With the best kill in the whole entire film not really being one kill as it's the sequence at the school where we do get to see all of the possessed kids going nuts and killing all of their teachers in really fun and gruesome ways with some of them throwing bricks at teacher and a girl scalps a teacher before cutting his head opening and scooping out and eating a piece of his brain and yet its not only the adults that get killed as we see a kid fall to his death where there are bunch of possessed kids standing on the roof his was just on this is something that does highlight the Children Of The Corn nature of the film and it is something that does work as it shows us just how far that these kids are willing to go to once they fully under The Ice Cream Man's control with it being something that does work for this film as it gives alot of really fun kills in such a short amount of time with the rest of the films kills being just as good as well in my freaking opinions anyways / at least.

SPOILERS END HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Overall believe all of the hate about this film as it's all true and while there alot more worse horror films out there just look at Darby's Screamhouse as one of them this surely really has to be one of the worst horror films of the year as apart from the kills and some of the acting there's really nothing all that redeemable about the film in my freaking opinions anyways / at least. Now then i've talked about all of the good and as well as all of the bad things that are in this very film in this very review and a such that really does mean that this very film really does earn itself a grand old score of exactly a 5 out of 10 from me.

Now then as for where I personally got all of the images that I personally used in this very review well then boys and girls and as well as ladies and gentlemen I personally got all of the images that I personally used in this very review from Tenor, Amazon . Co . Uk , IMP Awards . Com and Google Images. With my personally preferred website to use to get images from this film being Google Images simply because Google Images actually has images from this film really are up and on Google Images and plus pretty much much all of the images that I personally found on Google Images were all really very fairly high quality and as well as being as really very fairly high definition as well and so then horror fans we end this review as we always do with really our one and true goddess Elvira wishing us all some really very unpleasant dreams.

Darbie's Screamhouse Film Review

Horror knockoffs are a dime a dozen these days with seeming every single characters that's in the public domain getting one. Well we have a horror movie that's based on both a popular toy character that is still under copyright law and its successful 2023 film and if you want to know what character and movie this is knocking off just look at the films title as it's clear as day what character is being knocked off in this movie and to then join me as I review the film that likes to remind you of other better horror properties like The Munsters and Creature From The Black Lagoon with the film in question being called simply just "Darbie's Screamhouse" enjoy.

The plot of this film is when Darbie gets told that her boyfriend is cheating on her she sets out to kill all of the people that he's cheating on her with. Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual plot that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual plot that'd actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty really bad. Even for a film that's obviously using a beloved character as the main villain this films plot is bad like laughably bad as there is nothing to this films plot at all with it feeling like that the makers of this film wrote this film up over a weekend and called it a day as there is no thought and no effort put into this films plot. To say that this films plot is thin would be an understatement as while the film does indeed get to the plot right away it does take a good long while for the plot to really get going and when it does and when it does get to things that are interesting or decently done it gets cut off all for no reason with this being something that does leave the plot of the films feeling underbaked with one of the ideas of the film being something that is so stupid that it does actually work that being the fact that the doll characters in this film are literally dolls in the real world with them all even having an owner but the film does nothing with that idea and yet it's the best part of the films plot, this films plot can best be described as nothing alot happens for an hour followed by everything happening in the final thirteen minuets of the film as that what it felt like alot of the time as the film doesn't devote any time to fully fleshing out it's plot with the plot of this film also not really being really rather entertaining and as well as not really being really rather engaging either in my freaking opinions anyways / at least. 

Starring in this film is this films co-writer -co-composer and executive producer Jessa Jupiter Flux as Darbie , Ashleigh Amberlynn as Ditzie Darbie , Brent W. Black as Brent and Angel Nichole Bradford as Danger Darbie. Also starring in this film is Joe Casterline as Beach Blanket Ben , Kimberly Lynn Cole as The Mayor , Mel Heflin as Rodeo Darbie , Jimmy Kelley as Jimbo , Fallon Maressa as Dream Date , Kasper Meltedhair as Deidre Doll , Claude D. Miles as Ben , Newt Wallen as Sleazy Steve and Ana Xaden as Tripper.

Now then interms of what I personally thought / felt about the actual acting that's actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual acting that'd actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty really bad. Even for one of these extremely cheaply made horror films where the actors are usually just friends with the director the acting is bad even the child actor that they got to play the dolls owner is bad this is of course none of the actors fault as they are being told to act a certain but when your leading actor has so many other roles in the films production then she really should have stepped up her game and made sure that the director and co-writer Donald Farmer knew what he was doing as it does seem like he had no idea on how to get a good performance out of his actors and it is something that really does show in this film. With the best actor in the film being Mel Heflin as Rodeo Darbie as she looks like she's the only one who is having a good time in making this film and is fully committed to it does this make her performance in the film good no but it does make her better then alot of the films other actors with her character her character a southern charm that does make her character more fun with this being being something that does come through in her performance. With the acting that's in this film not really being helped by the fact that this films script is just so bad as it gives none of this films actors absolutely nothing to work with interms of what it is that there actual characters personalities are even meant to be in the first place which is something that really does harm the overall quality of the acting that's in this very film.

Character wise it does go without saying as alike alot of these horror movies the films characters are at best weak. As none of this films characters ate even remotely well written with all of them just being bland and boring characters that feel like characters in a decently written Barbie horror fanfiction look to be fair this films characters were never ever going to be that good as this films script was more then likely written in a week with there being no re-writes to the films script yet if there was re-writes to the script then the makes of the film could have taken the chance to make the films characters at the very least passable as Darbie is just a dumb character who is literally just Barbie but with no charm to her and the rest of her line of dolls all have the personality of there name Ditzy Darbie is dumb , Rodeo Darbie loves country , Danger Darbie loves sports which isn't dangerous at all and Tripper is nosey these are the more stereotypical character traits that they could give a character with all of the male characters having zero personality which given that there ripping of Ken is oddly fitting. Heck they even fail to understand that being into sports isn't a dangerous thing therefor calling a character Danger Darbie makes to sense when you could have called her Sporty Darbie and having two characters in the film serving as the films dumb character just doesn't work and is just pure lazy writing on the behalf of the makers of this film with it being obvious that the makers of this film are just coping the character traits of the characters in the 2023 live action Barbie movie without taking the time to realize what it was that made those character traits in that film work as well as did because if they did then this films characters would have been better written. 

It's pretty obvious just by looking at the title of the film that this film is ripping off the live action Barbie movie and the Barbie toyline in general. As everything about this film was done so much more better in that movie with even the fact that this film mainly takes lace in the world of the Darbie dolls here called Dollworld and occasionally cutting back to the real world whereas in the Barbie movie that movie was set both in Barbie Land and the real world world and even the title of the film is a play on Barbie's Dreamhouse this film is such a Barbie knock off that Mattel could actually have grounds to sue as while they are not using there characters it's clear as day who the knocks are meant to represent as the film makes no attempts to hide it. Just to be clear I was willing to go into this film with an open mind and fully accept it as a movie done in the vains of say The Mouse Trap or Popeye's Revenge but those movies at least had some level of thought put into what it was that they were knocking off and while yes the whole idea behind these films is always the fact that the killer is a beloved kids character however this film is such an obvious knock off of a much more better movie that it is hard to ignore alot alot of the time where as in alot of these other films you can easily just switch your brain of and accept it for what it is here tho you really can't do that as they do throw so much stuff at you that was done better in the Barbie movie that all it ends up doing is reminding you that you could have been watching that movie instead, this is something that wouldn't be an issue if the film had alot more redeeming qualities about it but it doesn't as there is clearly no thought and no effort put into this film and that is something that you do notice right away and becomes a bigger issue the longer that the film goes on heck if I made this film i'd be embarrassed by it as it is just that bad and that obvious of a Barbie knock off film.

There really is nothing all that redeeming about this film with the film even having dreadful sound al throughout the film. With characters from sounding there like there whispering even tho there in the same room as each other to suddenly SOUNDING LIKE THERE SOUTING in the same scene this is something that really does hit home the fact that this film was really poorly made as even The Mouse Trap had better sound quality then this film does and that film was made for cheaply in a couple of weeks where as with this film it does feel like everything came together in a matter of days with the films sound quality really suffering as a result of how cheaply made that this film was whereas if the makers of this film did take the time to fully make the film as best they could have done by raising the funds to get better equipment then we could have something that was at the very least watchable but we don't even have that. Look to be fair to this film this film it was made cheaply and this is something that does need to be taken into account but you can still get good quality sound cheaply just by going to a film school near your location and asking around for any students who are hoping to do something do with sound in the film industry this would have been something that would have given the film a much more better quality of the sound and it's something that they would have been able to do for next to nothing therefor it wouldn't have been a big chunk of the film budget and yet this is something that quite clearly never happened as the sound that we ended up getting just sounds bad with it making the makers of this film look like they had no quality control as they just let the film be released with this dreadful sound.

I really is hard to say on if this film is mean to be a horror comedy or not as while the film does feature some jokes in it. Alot of those jokes just aren't that good with the film having a running joke in which a newscast will repeat something that we've already seen with the directors name being mentioned at the bottom of the screen and that's it with even the characters acting so dumb that they could be in a comedy yet it's those jokes that do make the film feel like a horror comedy albeit one that is more in favor of being a comedy then a horror film when the balance really did need to be split equally with Darbie herself being a good example of this as even she is the films main villain she does get alot of moments to show us the fact that she is just a doll. With the fact that her idea of getting drunk is drinking root beer and the fact that all of her clothes are pink or have pink in them really playing into the main idea of these characters just being dolls something which the other characters to play into when they mention the fact that alot of them did get other toy sets whilst Ditzy Darbie never did and therefor only has the ne set of clothes which is a funny idea but the film never does anything with it as we never get to see her struggle to to choose what to wear in the morning or see her try not to get anything on her one and old dress these are things that are perfectly made for Ditzy Darbie as they would have played into the fact that there was only one toy set made for her and even tho it's a small thing to have in the film it is something that would have made for a decent running joke in the film instead of having a news cast show up to just repeat everything that we've just seen.

Now the this film has / had an exact grand total running time of exactly one hour and thirteen minuets and twenty three seconds. This on paper should have been a perfect running time for this kind of film to have as these films don't typically have that long of a running time in the first place but given the fact that it takes well over twenty minuets for the films plot to start of properly and the fact that it takes till around the thirty minuet mark for us to get to out first kill of the film that it then the running time does become a problem but it's one that could have been fixed by the makers of this film just by having them cut out alot of the pointless slow motion shots of Darbie and cut down on the films over two minuet opening sequence and give that running time to getting to the films plot early and to getting us at the first kill alot more quicker wit the film having more then enough plot there to cover that amount of running time in the first place. This film really doesn't use it's running time all that wisely as the film doesn't take the time to fully develop its plot as the film instead spends more time in getting alot of the actors playing the various Darbie to go topless for literally no reason whatsoever and not use that running time to fully develop it's plot with it being painfully obvious that the makers of this film cared more about getting alot of the female actors topless then they did about fully developing the plot of the film. This is also something that does effect the films character development as none of the films characters get any kind of character development which to be fair is par the course for these kinds of films but it is something that should still be called out as that's how the makers of these film listen with it being made clear that they cared more about showing of a signed picture of The Munsters then they did about giving the characters any kind of character development but I really will admit that this film really does have some really bad pacing to it tho. 

So now then as a slasher that really does mean that I have to actually talk about the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in this very film well then in all honesty I in all honesty personally thought / felt that the actual kills that are actually featured / presented to us in this very film was in all honesty really bad. With the actor playing Darbie not only missing her target alot of the time so much so that it does make the kills more comical then it does scary but the films kills are also lame as anything to watch and are filled with CGI blood, look having CGI blood in this case does make sense as again the film would have had a small budget but having your leading actor missing her target alot of the time is just bad film making. With there not even being a kill in the film that could be called the best ill of the film as they are all equally lame with them all having CGI blood in them and it's the same effect as well a it's just blood spurting up int the air which is fine for one kill but it's in all of them and it is something that does make you wonder what the quality control was like for this film as they are letting so many small things slip threw the cracks here that it does end creating one big problem with these things being made worse when you take into count that Darbie is missing all of her targets alot of the time and heck they even show us clear as day that she's not even close to hitting Danger Darbie which is just bad editing and is something that very easily could rea;;y have been fixed just by cutting to close up shot of Darbie it's that easy of a fix and yet the makers of this film clearly really didn't care enough to fix this mistake with the rest of the films kills being just as bad as well in my freaking opinions anyways / at lea

st.

Overall does it seven need saying what I think of this film by now as yeah even for a cheaply made horror film this film is bad as even The Mouse Trap whilst that film does have it's flaws still had decent sound and kills going for it this film doesn't even have those going for it in my freaking opinions anyways / at least. Now the  i've talked about all of the good and as well as all of the bad thigs that are in this very film in this very review and as such that really does mean that this very film really does earn itself a grand old score of exactly a 0 out of 10 from me.

Now then as for where I personally got all of the images that I personally used in this very review well then boys and girls and as well as ladies and gentlemen I personally got all of the images that I personally used in this very review from Tenor , Amazon . Co . Uk , IMP Awards . Com and Google Images. With my personally preferred website to use to get images from this film being Google Images simply because Google Images actually has images from this film really are up and on Google Images and plus pretty much much all of the images that I personally found on Google Images were all really very fairly high quality and as well as being as really very fairly high definition as well and so then horror fans we end this review as we always do with really our one and true goddess Elvira wishing us all some really very unpleasant dreams.